All Time South Park Episode Bracket

On a number of nights I have found myself tweeting with various people on the greatness of whatever South Park Episode happens to be on that night.  South park is set to begin it's 18th season in a few weeks.  As of right now there have been 247 episodes.  For the bracket I have narrowed them down to what I deem the best 64.  There were some very tough omissions.  The four most notable were Red Hot Catholic Love, You Got F'd in the A, Le Petit Tourette and Informative Murder Porn.

How I arranged the bracket:

1.  I went through each season episode guide and picked episodes I thought were great or particularly funny.  I also wanted to have at least 1 episode per season.  My personal opinion is South Park did not really take off until season 4 or season 5, but I have included a few early episodes that I particularly liked or were very culturally relevant at the time.

2.  I broke the bracket down into 4 groups I thought would divide the episodes fairly well.  Those groups are the Eric Cartman Bracket, The Randy Marsh and Butters Bracket, The Religion and Politics Bracket and the Everything Bracket.  There are multiple episodes in other groups that could probably go in the Eric Cartman Bracket (For instance Cartman's story in Imaginationland is probably my favorite non Scott Tenorman Cartman story), but I tried to make the brackets as even as possible. 

3.  I seeded the brackets based on how well received I thought all the episodes were.  For tiebreakers I put my own personal favorites slightly higher, but I tried to be somewhat objective in my seeding of the brackets.  There are episodes that I personally love that I may vote to go far, but I don't think other people like as much as I may.  Favorites are largely personal and I did not want the seeding in the bracket to just reflect my own personal preference.

4.  For multiple episodes that cover 1 plot I combined them into one episode for Bracket purpose.  That may give an unfair advantage to something like Imaginationland or Cartoon Wars, but I think it is hard to separate these episodes and view them individually.  Additionally, when you see the by season distribution breakdown I will note where one of those episodes was actually a multi-part episode.  A three part episode when rating the strength of the season is worth three episodes for the season as a whole (on that note season 17 was a particularly strong season compared to the few seasons prior).

5.  I did not include the movie.  These rankings are purely based on the television show.  The movie was great.  It's an awesome achievement and hilarious throughout.  I still cannot believe they have not brought back "The Mole" for a guest appearance on the show.  That guy killed me.  That said, i just did not think it was fair to include it.  The show and movie are doing different things. 

Distribution of Episodes by Season:

Season 1:  1
Season 2:  1
Season 3:  3
Season 4:  2
Season 5:  4
Season 6:  6
Season 7:  5
Season 8:  5
Season 9:  8
Season 10:  5, One of which is a 2 part episode
Season 11:  4, One of which is a 3 part episode
Season 12:  4
Season 13:  4
Season 14:  3, One of which is a 3 part episode
Season 15:  3
Season 16:  2
Season 17:   3, One of which is a 3 part episode

I would say from this distribution the peak of the series is season 9, 10 and 11, which seems pretty accurate to me.  Those were 3 incredible seasons of South Park. 

The Bracket:

Randy Marsh and Butters Bracket:

1.  The Losing Edge (Season 9, Episode 5)

16.  Marjorine (Season 9, Episode 9)

8.  The Death of Eric Cartman (Season 9, Episode 6)

9.  Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow (Season 9, Episode 8) 

4.  Professor Chaos (Season 6, Episode 6)

13.  Medicinal Fried Chicken (Season 14, Episode 3)

5.  T.M.I. (Season 15, Episode 4)

12.  My Future Self N’ Me (Season 6, Episode 16)

  

2.  Make Love Not Warcraft (Season 10, Episode 8)

15.  More Crap (Season 11, Episode 9)

7.  Consul Wars Trilogy (Season 17, Episodes 7-9) 

10.  The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs (Season 14, Episode 2)

3.  With Apologies to Jesse Jackson (Season 11, Episode 1)

14.  I’m a Little Bit Country (Season 7, Episode 4….100^th episode)

6.  Butters’ Very Own Episode (Season 5, Episode 14)

13.  Butters’ Bottom Bitch (Season 13, Episode 9)

    

     

Religion and Politics Bracket:

1.  Trapped in the Closet (Season 9, Episode 12)

16.  It Hits the Fan (Season 5, Episode 1)

8.  About Last Night (Season 12, Episode 12)

9.  Crack Baby Athletic Association (Season 15, Episode 5)

4.  Mystery of the Urinal Deuce (Season 10, Episode 9)

13.  The Return of Chef (Season 10, Episode 1)

5.  Christian Rock Hard (Season 7, Episode 9)

12.  Rainforest Shmainforest (Season 3, episode 1)

2.  All About Mormons (Season 7, Episode 12)

15.  The Wacky Molestation Adventure (Season 4, Episode 16)

7.  Dances with Smurfs (Season 13, Episode 13)

10.  Best Friends Forever (Season 9, Episode 4)

3.  The Passion of the Jew (Season 8, Episode 3)

14.  Ginger Cow (Season 17, Episode 6)           

6.  Woodland Critter Christmas (Season 8, Episode 14)

11.  Goodbacks (Season 8, Episode 7)

Eric Cartman Bracket:

1.   Scott Tenorman Must Die (Season 5, Episode 4)

16.  Cartman’s Mom is a Dirt Slut (Season 1, episode 13)

8.  Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy (Season 10, Episode 10)

9.  Cartman Sucks (Season 11, Episode 2)

4.  Kenny Dies (Season 5, Episode 13)

13.  Fatbeard (Season 13, Episode 7)

     

5.  Awesom-O (Season 8, Episode 5)

12.  Die Hippie Die (Season 9, Episode 2)

2.  Ginger Kids (Season 9, Episode 11)

15.  Fat Camp (Season 4, Episode 15)

7.  Cartmanland (Season 5, Episode 6)

10.  Fishsticks (Season 13, Episode 5)

3.  Casa Bonita (Season 7, Episode 11)

14.  The Coon and Friends Trilogy (Season 14, Episode 11-13)

6.  Tonsil Trouble (Season 12, Episode 1)

11.  World War Zimmerman (Season 17, Episode 3)    

Everything Bracket:

1.   Imaginationland (Season 11, Episodes 10-12)

16.  Cash for Gold (Season 16, Episode 2)

8.  Good Times With Weapons (Season 8, Episode 1)

9.  Child Abduction is not Funny (Season 6, Episode 11)

4.  The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring (Season 6, Episode 13)

13.  Asspen (Season 6, Episode 2)

5.  Brest Cancer Show Ever (Season 12, Episode 9)

12.  You’re Getting Old (Season 15, Episode 7)

     

2.  Cartoon Wars (Season 10, Episodes 3-4)

15.  Major Boobage (Season 12, Episode 3)

7.   Lil Crime Stoppers (Season 7, Episode 6)

10.  Spookyfish (Season 2, episode 15)

3.  The Red Badge of Gayness (Season 3, Episode 14)

14.  Chinpokomon  (Season 3, Episode 11)

6.   The Death Camp of Tolerance (Season 6, Episode 14)

11.  Reverse Cowgirl (Season 16, Episode 1)

  
I will be releasing polls to vote on each bracket, with my thoughts on each of these episodes.  You will be able to vote throughout the next few days.  If you have any thoughts on seeding I got wrong, or episodes I have wrongfully excluded tweet me at @bearcatmark1 or leave a comment below.  

The Future of Bearcat Football

(Can the Bearcats stay relevant in a largely irrelevant football conference?)

Another year of Bearcat football will finally arrive on Friday night.  For me and the many fans like me the wait has been far too long.  A two week bye left UC off the football map while everyone else played.  It so happens that off the football map is exactly what UC must avoid as it lingers in the purgatory of Gang of Five football.  Those first two bye weeks are a microcosm of everything this program is fighting and striving to avoid.  Five ten win seasons in 7 years, 6 bowls, 4 BCS conference titles, 2 BCS bids and an undefeated regular season that left the Bearcats 1 second from playing for a National Championship…those are the heights the program has reached in the recent past.  Getting there was a climb that required the stabilizing of a football program, great achievement in the athletic department, investment in resources, moving to a new conference and two particularly great coaching hires.  As we move into the 2014 season you cannot blame any Bearcat fan for asking:  Can the Bearcats stay relevant in a largely irrelevant football conference?

I hate to say bad things about the American Athletic Conference.  I want the conference to succeed and I want it to get recognition.  I want it to be far and away the best G5 conference and I honestly think it will be.  I think there are programs that can have success in it, but as a whole it’s still going to be far below any of the P5 conferences.   By all accounts the AAC actually had a really good year last year at the top.  UCF lost one game and dominated the Big 12 champ in the Fiesta Bowl.  Houston had a solid year, future members ECU and Navy were really good.  The Bearcats had a 9-4 season that was disappointing, but not really a knock on the league.  Of course, the bottom of the conference was abysmal and the start to this season has been defined by missed opportunities (UCF blowing the PSU game by starting the wrong guy, Memphis losing close late to UCLA, ECU losing close late to South Carolina, Houston getting waxed by UTSA) and bad teams looking bad.  No team was ranked from the conference to start the season and this despite last year’s champ winning its BCS bowl.  It’s hard to stay nationally relevant when you are not on the national radar and it’s hard to be on the national radar in the AAC.

So once again, can the Bearcats stay relevant in a largely irrelevant football conference?  YES.  That’s my simply answer and I don’t think it’s the optimistic in me.  It is possible to stay nationally relevant in a conference like the AAC, but there is only one way to do so….excellence.  The Bearcats must be excellent if they are to remain relevant in the ever changing landscape of college football.  TCU, Utah and Boise State are all examples of programs that became very relevant playing in lesser conferences.  It can be done.  It cannot be done with 9-4 seasons and it cannot be done by slipping past mediocre to poor conference opponents.  The Bearcats need to dominate the dregs of the league.  They need to beat the teams at the top the vast majority of the time and they need to win big games out of conference.  Without excellence, the Bearcats become lost in the system, they become an afterthought and it is far harder to get back to relevance than to stay there. 

This is the 5^th college football season since the incredible run of 2009.  The Bearcat’s relevance on the college football landscape has slipped.  It slipped when Butch’s first team bumbled its way through a 4-8 season and though they shared in conference titles the following 2 years, by not being the BCS representative the Bearcats while still relevant as a top team in a BCS conference never got back to the levels reached in 2009.  Everything the Bearcats have done since Butch Jones left for Tennessee has been in an effort to stay relevant and hopefully get to the college football promise land and play in a top notch conference.  The day after Butch Jones left, the Bearcats hired Tommy Tuberville from Texas Tech.  Coach Tubs had spent most of his career as a head coach in the SEC, first at Ole Miss then producing a great run at Auburn, even going unbeaten in the SEC and somehow not getting to play for a National Title.  The Bearcats have committed to investing in their football program by expanding and modernizing Nippert Stadium.   Additionally, Tuberville seems to have them recruiting at a P5 level.    There is a lot in place that fans can get excited about. 

However, another 9-4 season will be a huge step backwards for this program.  Last season there were highs and there were lows.  Simply put, Tuberville’s first seasons was a complete mixed bag.  The roster was much more talented than the 4 loss team we saw and at times showed that talent.  It also had some horrific performances such as games at Miami, at South Florida, at Illinois and the Bowl game against UNC.  It’s worth noting that UC’s last coaching change produced a 4-8 first year before back to back 10 win seasons with shared Big East Titles.  Coaching changes can be tough, they are often a huge adjustment in the first year for the players.  Really, of UC’s last 5 coaches only Brian Kelly managed to excel his first year and have a team live up to its potential.  Year two, however, is a big deal.  It says a lot about the direction of the program, especially when the talent is in place…and make no mistake the talent is in place this year. 

To me, anything short of a 10 win regular season will be a disappointment for this team.  Ten wins will put UC in the thick of the AAC race.  11 wins will likely be enough for an Access Bowl bid.  These are the sights the UC program needs to aim for every season.  10+ win regular seasons are how the Bearcat program will stay relevant in a largely irrelevant conference.  Relevance keeps the remarkable rise of Bearcat football alive and moves it forward hopefully to new heights.  We ultimately hope those new heights include resuming UC’s place at the big boy table and playing for a P5 conference.

UC is a program that has succeeded on the field at a level where it deserves to be there and a program with an administration that seems committed to bringing the Bearcats back to that level.  Looking at the future of UC football the program must be excellent.  It must be the premier G5 program.  If the program achieves excellence it will continue to thrive and will likely get to where it wants to go.  Without excellence UC football could go the way of the conference it resides in and become largely irrelevant.  In short, the next few years are huge and as a fan, I can’t wait to witness it.  I hope to see as many Bearcat fans down at PBS as possible Friday night.  Go Bearcats!